Listen you Magilla Gorilla lookin' MFer, you can give me all the crap you want http://www.qcforc.org/showthread.php...nd-Trip!/page4 about how I obsess over winning or always have to be the center of attention, but I know you. I know you fiend for the same notoriety that I do. You want it, but because you know that you can't achieve it, you are careful to build in pre-determined excuses: "I'm 15lbs heavier than last year." "I don't try to be be fast." "I don't know if I'll make it to the Fest this year. Wifey wants to go shopping at Ikea that weekend." Whatever, Dude. It's a good strategy, but I see right through the muck at a guy who wants so badly to finish something, ANYTHING victorious that he can hardly stand to look at himself in the mirror each morning.

Chin up, Farmboy. Look at the positives...Like, uh...Like...Well, listen. If you just keep trying, things are bound to go your way. You are generally a very nice guy and I'm sure people - somewhere - like you. Did an entire mountain biking club put "Farmboy" on the back of their official club shirts? No, but seriously, who gets honored like that? Wait. Your club mates all wear shirts that say "Dirt" on the back? You got me there...Let's set the standard a tad lower. Okay, no more BS...I can't think of anything! Let's just settle with you're a good dude and at least you are the ONE Lambanita who had the huevos to stand up to me and my big mouth at all. I gotta respect that. Get your monkey-lovin' brothers together, start training, drop that 15, and bring your A game in 30 days.